Woolly vests

The dog was thrilled that someone admired her knitted jumper yesterday, and thought she might like to show the world her wardrobe. She apologises for the number of times she's had her photo taken when she's having a bad hair day.

There's the tartan thermal number, German-made, bought by kind thoughtful owner on a bitterly cold trip to Prague, during which, of course, the dog stayed home in comfort with her foster mother. Best for wet or snowy weather, as it dries quickly, but the dog complains when it's put on straight from a radiator, as those hot metal press-studs can hurt.

The others were knitted by foster-mother Sandra, whom the dog loves dearly. Given too much leeway and Sandra would knit the dog an entire layette, in pastels, but once she'd tweaked the coat pattern sufficiently, she reluctantly abandoned the notion of bootees, matinee jackets and a little balaclava.

This is the prototype coat, a pensioner's type of woolly, affectionately known as Uncle Walter's Tank Top after a friend's elderly relative. An sensible, everyday sort of affair, could go with a tweed cap and a packet of peppermint drops. Ooh, the dog could just fancy a peppermint drop....

And finally the Reversible: kept for really cold days. Warm enough to allow for much dawdling, reading the news at every corner, plodding slowly homeward, hoping it will be dinner time.

Or for extra protection from the wind when a defenceless, flinching victim dog has just been ruthlessly scalped by Denise at Posh Pups.

This is not just high fashion, it's high-spec protective gear.